No Hookah and No Fap held well, not too many issues yet.
Cold showers = endorphin frenzy. A serious spike in energy and brain activity. I could get addicted to this.
Think I’ll gently ease out of hookah like with working out. Reducing the frequency slowly. Did not smoke yesterday for the first time in 6 months, but it got fugly at times. Crazy cognitive dissonance. Starting out with a tiny desire, went on to an intense craving, then to almost overpowering thoughts about postponing this experiment, to a self loathing and definitive(in my brain) conclusion that I wont be able to kick the habit, to a dull depression. All of this happened in 2 hours, thankfully had engagements after that and was distracted. Intense craving at night before sleeping, unable to sleep well.
Breaking habits is crazy, specially when you decide NOT to do something (stopping smoking as opposed to, say working out.) When you decide to do something, there is a tangible benefit and self esteem rise that happens every time you do it. With resisting from doing something, every time you resist, your limited willpower gets depleted, making you more vulnerable to bad choices. That’s the theory anyway.
If yesterday was any indication, its all in the mind though. The brain distorts, manipulates and reaches definitive conclusions, it induces mood swings and does everything it canto resist change. Kind of like a shape shifting poltergeist.
TL;DR : Its all in the mind, really, habits can be easily broken regardless of theory. The brain is delusional and not to be trusted.
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End of day — There is SO much time in the world now that I’m on a break, I’m barely using just 20 % of the possible limit. Need to really push on that front. The hours spent on the internet reading about self improvement has turned into the finer forms of intellectual masturbation..I suspect I’m even drawing my identity from it. And therefore, it needs to be broken down. Tomorrow is a day of fasting. No hookah, no dot, no internet apart from research. AT ALL.
Speaking of which, think its becoming easier to control the massive hookah pangs at around 815-830 at night. This will slowly extend to the whole day, I’m sure.
FINALLY, some change on the horizon. This is gonna be fun.
